Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said,
"Where did you get such a great bike?"

The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."

The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; The clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

_____________________________

Comprehending Engineers- Chapter Two

An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there.

The engineer said, "I like both." "Both?" they asked

"Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other, and you can go to the plant and get some work done."

_________________________________

Comprehending Engineers- Chapter Three 

What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers?

Mechanical Engineers build weapons, Civil Engineers build targets.

_________________________________

Comprehending Engineers- Chapter Four

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"

The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"

The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"

The graduate with an Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

_________________________________

Comprehending Engineers- Chapter Five

To the optimist, the glass is half full.

To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty.

To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

__________________________________

Comprehending Engineers- Chapter Six

Four Engineers, a mechanical, a chemical, an electrical and a software engineer, were traveling in a car when, suddenly, the car stopped. "Sounds to me as if the pistons have seized.

We'll have to strip down the engine before we can get the car working again" said the mechanical engineer.

Well," said the chemical engineer, "it sounded to me as if the fuel might be contaminated. I think we should clean out the fuel system." "I think it might be a grounding problem," said the electrical engineer," or maybe a faulty plug wire." All three turned to the software engineer who had said nothing.

"Well, what do you think?" they asked. He replied, "Well, perhaps if we all get out of the car and get back in again ..."

Copyright Family Guardian Fellowship